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Today I was thinking about gratitude. Firstly that maybe I didn't get what I wanted yesterday because I wasn't gratefull for what I have, Then I thought, what about me? Am I gratefull to myself? When we think about being gratefull for our gifts, there is am implication that they come from somewhere outside ourselves. They don't. They come from me being me. From the decisions I have made and the interests I have persued. The base abilities, like thinking, might have been influenced by something outside me or they might have been the accident of genetics and upbringing. I litterally don't know, so I am going to be gratefull to me.
This is necessary in order to give. I can't give if I can't recieve, and most of what I recieve comes from me. I admit I have had trouble recieving most of my adult life. I have been working on that.

Don't get me wrong, I am also gratefull to you. ALl of you. And to the universe, fate, karma, or whatever may or may not be responsible for certain pushes and suggestions. But it is time I got on that list.

Thankyouthankyouthankyou

love

Date: 2009-04-04 01:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] passaddhi.livejournal.com
Gratitude, the pure kind, doesn't have to have a direction.

Date: 2009-04-04 09:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mplsfish.livejournal.com
Well thats good. I don't generally have any kind of direction.

Gratitude

Date: 2009-04-04 03:13 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
It seems most adults (at least the self sufficent ones) have problems accepting things and being grateful. Perhaps that's just the nature of the beast, when you receive something from another you feel a bit beholden to them, despite the spirit. When you receive something from yourself it's also pride in what you have accomplished, which runs counter to the humility of gratitude.
Two sides of my .02.
Hope things are going better. doing Minicon?

Gratitude

Date: 2009-04-04 03:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] geohard.livejournal.com
It seems most adults (at least the self sufficient ones) have problems accepting things and being grateful. Perhaps that's just the nature of the beast, when you receive something from another you feel a bit beholden to them, despite the spirit. When you receive something from yourself it's also pride in what you have accomplished, which runs counter to the humility of gratitude.
Two sides of my .02.
Hope things are going better. doing Minicon?

Re: Gratitude

Date: 2009-04-04 03:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mplsfish.livejournal.com
the humility of gratitude...

That may have been what I was getting at.

Good to see you here. I am not planning on attending minicon. There have been and will be a HUGE number of conventions this year and I am broke. I am also the on call doula on saturday of the con so partying would not help that effort. I may drop in but I doubt it.

Re: Gratitude

Date: 2009-04-04 08:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] geohard.livejournal.com
Just to show my ignorance, what's an "on call doula"?

Re: Gratitude

Date: 2009-04-04 09:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mplsfish.livejournal.com
"Doula:
The term doula is Greek for slave or servant.
A doula is an assistant who provides various forms of non-medical support (physical, emotional and informed choice) in the childbirth process."

I am a volenteer at Woodwinds Hospital. I am just getting started. Haven't actually attended a birth yet despite TWO shifts on call.

I have been locking posts lately due to the number of people I don't want to friend back reading my blog. I friended you though, so you can get caught up if you want.

Re: Gratitude

Date: 2009-04-04 09:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] geohard.livejournal.com
Very worthwhile, Thanks! and thanks for friending me (friending, apparently lj spell check doesn't like verbing).

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